Tuesday, June 2, 2020

I had a baby!

So I have finally had my little baby girl and I could not be happier. She is absolutely perfect and I am totally totally in love.

So I thought I’d share my birth story..

My waters broke at around 8pm on Wednesday. It was so weird like a popping sensation downstairs and then this water and mucus all came gushing out. I said to Ant my waters have broken.. really calmly and he was like really? Are you sure? I looked down at all this water and thought yup! This is really happening.. 

He came running in and seeing what he could do to help and I said nothing we just need to be calm - as I was really starting to panic. Obviously I’ve been pregnant for ages and thought about this moment for so long but it was so scary to think, I’m actually going to give birth in the next couple days or whatever it may be. 
Me and Ant decided to take our time calling the hospital cos we thought he’d be sent away if I had to stay for any reason. We called around 9pm and after I explain my waters to them they asked me to come in and get checked. Turns out there was meconium in baby’s waters which could mean baby is in distress. 
When I got to the hospital, Ant had to wait in the car because of the virus and whatnot. They put me on the monitor to check baby’s heart rate and then they did a speculum (they put a probe or something up my vjay to check theres nothing off going on & checked my cervix to see how displayed I was. 
I was 2cm and contractions started really quickly. They said they’d like me to stay in cos of the meconium but I could have gone home if I wanted to. 
 I complained I was really upset and scared cos I thought Ant couldn’t stay in till I was 4cm but he was allowed, I was so pleased and relieved. I was in so much pain (or what I thought was pain at the time LOL it was gonna her a lot worse as my mum was messaging me to say!) 
I honestly would have taken Ant over painkillers though, I just needed him with more than anything. 
I wasn’t allowed the birthing centre at all cos of the worry about baby which was a bit gutting but understandable. When I wrote my birth plan I was very much aware everything could change. 
We moved to the labour room and fuck the contractions were coming super quick and super painful. I had gas and air and Ant came in too. The plan was to check me in 4 hours to see how much more I’d dilated. Anyway fast forward 3 hours of these strong contractions & I couldn’t take the pain I turned down pethidine cos I just didn’t like the thought of it when we’d researched it before. It could make you so drowsy and sleepy, which I didn’t like the sound of when you’re in labour. It doesn’t take the pain away it makes you not care about it. Just didn’t sound like something I wanted. It could also make you sick and I hate throwing up!
 So Ant asked if I could go straight to an epidural, which was the best idea ever. I was all for an epidural in my plans and at the moment I’m time! So they checked me cos I’d need to be at least 4cm. Turns out I was 4cm and so allowed it. I had the epidural which was fine getting done, I had the bits where injections go numbed and to be honest, the contractions were so agonising I didn’t care. Just get me pain relief! It did feel like forever though! I was warned a thousand times I had to stay still whilst the injection went in which was so hard when contracting! But I did it and oh my, when it kicked in it was just amazing as it just meant I couldn’t feel the contractions anymore. Such a relief cos I genuinely couldn’t hack it. They checked me again 45 mins later and I’d gone from 4cm to 9cm! (Which if I hadn’t had the epidural probs would have been better cos I could be pushing soon) now I had to wait around to get the last cm.. when I was 10cm they said I needed to wait an hour for baby’s head to come further down so I didn’t have to push more cos it was gonna be hard as I was numb. 
Anyway, the longest hour of my life passed by.. It was so strange because I was totally back in the room after the epidural. I was back down to earth because the pain had gone. Bit anxiety really set in because I was able to think clearly again.. I was starting to get panicky about the fact I had to push a baby out soon. 
I had a quick FaceTime with mum whilst we waited. I felt bad I had text or kept up with anyone but it was so hard! I don’t remember the call a whole lot as I was pretty out of it. But I know I enjoyed speaking to her - even if it was a bit surreal cos I was in labour! But then my contractions starting coming back and I needed more gas & air so I had to go.. 
They checked me again and I was okay to push. This was so hard with an epidural cos I couldn’t feel my body to know if I was pushing at all. Anyway I kept at it.. I’d lay there until the midwife told me I was having a contraction and then I’d take a huge deep breath and then push as hard as I could 4 times. The epidural eventually starting wearing off and I started to be able to feel the contractions and my downstairs area to be able to push. This was much easier now I had more control but still took a lot a lot of energy. I was so knackered as well from labouring so far.
I would take a deep breath and push as hard as I could 4 times then quickly get my breath back and heart rate down until we had to go again. This went of for an hour and a half, it was really tough. Ant said this was the hardest thing for him as well because he could see how hard I was working and how slow the progress was.
Then the doctor was called because apparently after an hour of pushing they say they like the intervene after that. I had an extra half hour as they were busy when we called which sucked!
Anyway, they offered intervention and I was all for it. They gave me a top up on the epidural, numbed my downstairs, and performed an episiotomy (Made a cut down there) and used a suction cup on baby’s head to get her out. Omg why didn’t they do this ages ago!! I needed this so badly. 
I began pushing again and they got the head out, then another big push and she came out. The biggest relief I’ve ever felt in my life! I heard Ant say something along the lines of ‘baby she’s here’ all teary and it still makes me cry. He watched her being brought out and up to my chest. 
They placed her on top of me straight away and it was honestly the best feeling in the entire world! All the previous labouring and anything else bad in the world just completely disappeared. A feeling I can’t explain. Just incredible. 
She cried straight away and it was amazing. They took her off quickly to do some checks and gave her back to me so me and Ant could stare at her in disbelief. Ant was so sweet, he was crying and we both just looked at each other like we did it!
She was on my chest whilst they gave me the injection to get the placenta out, I felt them pushing on my tummy to get it out, I didn’t actually see it at all. They also stitched me up, thankfully I couldn’t feel anything cos of the epidural. Because baby was on me nothing else that was going on down there mattered at all. 
It was such an incredible and painful experience and I keep saying I won’t do it again but honestly looking at my baby I probably will. She’s is SO worth it. 
Childbirth is no joke, I had such a good experience as well and I’m still like.. wow it’s pretty damn awful. 10 hours from my waters breaking to having my daughter here, I managed no c-section which was my biggest point in my birth plan. I really wanted a natural birth & so pleased I did it. 
There was one point in the labour where baby’s heart rate dipped and the emergency buzzer was pressed, loads of doctors and nurses came running in, this was the scariest thing ever. The doctor explaining baby’s heart rate has dropped so they’re taking me to theatre to try and get it back up and if they couldn’t I’d need an emergency section. At this point I was like fine. Please just get her out! It was just terrifying I just kept screaming please tell me my baby is okay!! I felt so sorry for Ant (Afterwards cos I was pretty out of it) because he was going through this highly stressful situation sober and he said this was the scariest thing ever for him too. It was awful. But before the doctor has really finished his sentence another nurse announced baby’s heart rate had come back up again. Relief!! 
Going back to Ant.. he was honestly the best birthing partner anyone could ask for. He was just perfect. He stayed completely calm for me, he sorted out my TENS machine, he put a drink to my mouth every minute, he put lip balm on for me, he was constantly helping me breathe, kept telling me I was doing great and we’d meet our daughter soon.. he was just incredible. He also kept on top of texting family to update them which I was so grateful for. Honestly words can’t explain my love for him. I didn’t think I could be any more in love with him but somehow I am. 
Anyway back to baby being born.. once I was stitched and sorted, baby was weighed and checked over and was fine and we were left to be a little family for an hour or so (Ant has to leave early because of the virus, he actually left a little earlier anyway cos he was so exhausted. It was totally understandably. What a night we’d had). 
Ant was an emotional wreck now, it was just the 3 of us and he kept looking at her and crying. He picked her up and put a little nappy on her. He was in complete awe of her and it melted my heart. 
I actually feel so guilty about this part of the birth story because they were having such a moment and I was so out of it. I was throwing up and Ant was asking if I wanted a cuddle and I couldn’t. My arms were so weak from using all my strength pushing again Ant and the midwife earlier.. I was dopey, sick, and more tired than I’ve ever felt before. 
But I love our baby girl so much, we named her Ada Louise Wheatley and I cannot stop looking at her. She’s absolutely perfect. Born 28th May 2020 weighing 6lb2oz 








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